Bluebird

Yesterday I took a much needed long walk - my dog, Mitzi, and I walked through the winding streets of my neighborhood. I didn't bring music - yesterday was a blustery precursor to todays wintery weather, so I was bundled up, gloves on.  

 

I didn't take music because I wanted to hear, and see, all that was around me.  I listened to the wind comb through the pompano grass,and toss the trees around.  I watched and listened as newly fallen leaves skittered and scrambled across the road.  I took in the colors of the rare leaves that showed out fall splendor, a rare thing in our parts.  I watched the thin white clouds stretch across the endless blue sky.

 

As I moved through the neighborhood, around mile 4 I entered the side entrance, and there, on the white fence, were several small birds.  I watched them fly in and off, and I recognized their swooping flight.  It was a little flock of bluebirds, lighting on the fence, then quickly flying off. 

 

Immediately I was taken back to this time last year.  I was in the middle of a very undeserved and very painful persecution at work.  I had been relegated to cubicle land, far away from the patient areas I so loved to work at.  Since I was grasping at straws to find things to do, and because I was allotted an hour for lunch, every day I would step out the back door, and onto the track behind the building.  

 

As I circled the track, for many weeks there were a couple dozen bluebirds that would fly in and frolic around the field and track.  I have always loved bluebirds - they are sweet little birds with their bright red plummage in the front, flashy white chest, and lovely blue wings.  Up north, they are a sign of spring.

 

In the long fall last year, they were my cheerful,  swooping companions.  They daily brought a smile to my face, cheering me before I went back to my cubicle, and to uncertainty.

 

Flash forward a year.

 

The persecution is over - the persecuter was removed from the service.  I have been completely exhonerated.  I am back doing what I love, which is taking care of patients.  

 

Yesterday, as I was on this long walk and I turned into a portion that added a mile, to see the bluebirds brought to mind the painful past - but also reminded me that my deliverer is faithful.  Instead of being a reminder of the past pain, it reminded me that I was completely cleared, that all of that trial is behind me, and the Lord is faithful to his promise.  He told me to stand, for I had done no wrong.  So I stood - for two years.  

 

I'm thankful for the bluebirds.  I am thankful for the sparrow - for His eye is also on the sparrow, and He DOES watch over us.

 

This month, be purposefully thankful.  Even if you are in the midst of a severe trial, we have some much to be thankful for.  Today, I was thankful for a warm house, and warm clothes, and a warm car.  There are a lot of people without this season.  I was a struggling single mom oh those years ago, and I myself couldn't afford thanksgiving dinner.  The Lord provided me dinner.  

 

Matthew 6:26New King James Version (NKJV)

²⁶ Look at the birds of the air, for they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they?

He is concerned about you.  If you need prayer, if you have a need, let us know.

I leave you with one of my favorite songs, and it is speaking to me, too.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yNkdzdttw5Y&feature=player_detailpage

We are praying for you!

The Unwanted, Uncertain Road

Good Morning, Good Afternoon, or Good Day!

 

I hope you all had a successful week of setting a goal and meeting it - I know for me, it is really helping me stay positive.  My personal goal is to go to the beach once a week.  I have gone three weeks in a row - and I went today, in case the rest of the week doesn't pan out!  I am frustrated that I cannot exercise and meet the personal physical activity goals that I have, but I sent another goal so I can see that something good came forth from it.  The trips to the beach have been positively therapeutic!  I love to just listen to the waves.  It is a balm to this tired soul.

 

I am currently going through an unwanted, uncertain journey - one that I certainly did not pick.  

 

Three years ago I was diagnosed with significant back problems.  I was NOT happy with the diagnosis, and I asked the neurosurgeon if there was anything I could do to NOT have to have surgery.  He gave me suggestions to lose some weight, work on my core strength, and get healthier.  I took it all to heart - I had also just been diagnosed a month earlier with type 2 diabetes, which also was making me very frustrated and unhappy.  Although not the picture of perfect health at diagnosis, I am not the "typical" diabetic.  But the genetic deck was stacked against me, so here I am.

 

For the next three years, I lost 30 pounds, because very health conscious and made some real positive changes.  

 

Then on May 14, I was reaching into the trunk of my car, and was dropped to my knees by agonizing pain in my lower back.  Since then, I have been out of work, on muscle relaxers and pain meds, and in some level of constant pain.  

 

I don't want to be here.  I DO NOT want surgery.  But I cannot work in the state my back is in.  So tomorrow, Monday, I am going to get an MRI and then hopefully get worked in to see my neurosurgeon.

 

This is an unwanted, uncertain road.  I don't want surgery.  But I can't continue without doing something - it is a degenerative process, and eventually it could incapacitate me.  I am WAY too young to be taken out of the game - I have too much to do for the Lord, too much work to do, too much traveling!!  

 

Likewise, none of us wanted to get divorced.  You have heard and seen the pain that it causes - both to you, and your families.  It's a faith walk, where you have to put it in God's hands and say "Lead me, Lord".  It's a day by day test of your resolve - will you follow Him?  Will you trust Him, no matter how grim things may look?  No matter what the judge says, what doors may be closing?  There is always more than we can see, but that is little comfort when we are at the crossroads, wondering what to do next.

 

Again, I love the Word so much, because it tells the story of people facing situations like we face, and tells the WHOLE story - with the ending, with God getting the glory.  We don't know what the ending will be right now - but rest assured, God does!

 

Take some time to look at these passages and reflect on them, and how they relate to where YOU are:

 

 

     1 Kings 17 Tells the story of Elijah.  After having to confront the evil Ahab, and the equally evil wife of Ahab Queen Jezebel (a name still synonamous with evil), God sent Elijah to live in the desert at Cherith, where he was fed by ravens. (Sound like a faith walk?)  Then God sent him to Zarephath, which was in Sidon, the home of Jezebel and her family.  So essentially, the Lord used this refining ground for Elijah.  Doesn't sound like a good time.  I doubt he was praising God and loving life.  But through this process, the Lord led Elijah to defeat 850 evil prophets of Ba'al and Asherah.  This was a very tough road to walk down, but in the end there was great victory for the Lord!  Incidentally, Elijah was with Moses at the transfiguration of Christ.  His tough road brought a great victory!

 

 

     Genesis 50:20 Is the quintessential summation of the trials of Joseph, the man who saved Israel before it was a nation.  The verse says "As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good, in order to bring about this present result, to preserve many people alive."  Joseph was thrown into a hole by his jealous brothers, and sold into slavery.  He had a LONG journey of suffering, pain, temptation, and humiliation - pretty much most of his life was spent in bondage, in prison, captive.  BUT GOD...took this situation and used it not only to save the family that had sold him to slavery and potential death, but also saved Israel.  Again, it was not the path Joseph would have chosen.  But God used this unwanted, uncertain road to be glorified.  In Genesis 37 the story begins.  I highly suggest you read it!

 

     Matthew 26:39 "My Father, if it be possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as You will."  This was Jesus praying in the garden of Gethsemane, the night they arrested Him.  While his friend the disciples, who were supposed to be watching over him, were sleeping, the fully human part of Jesus was agonizing over what was to come.  He knew what had to happen - but the human part was begging His Heavenly Father to let it happen another way, to let it pass Him by.  

 

We have said so many times that you all didn't get married with the intent of getting divorced - and you have, in most cases, done everything within your human power to bargain, plead, and beg God to intervene and bring healing to your family.  Despite that, and knowing the pain that is to come, you are left with an unwanted, uncertain road - one that leads to divorce.  Division.  Strife. Pain. Heatbreak.

 

BUT GOD...He will exchange beauty for ashes (Isaiah 61:3), blessing for mourning.  

 

It's hard to see that, I know.

 

Stay in the Word. Stay talking to Him.  Pour out your heart to Him.  He can take it - and as seen by the passage in Matthew, He truly understands.